Its an enigma when you fall in love and accept that some good things never last. Suddenly you'll begin to see yourself as nothing. Its agony to accept that despite the feelings you have, its all not enough, but when you love someone, you would do the hardest thing and yes its not going to be easy, but at least you know that what you felt was real in the end, you'll ask yourself “does it hurt?”. Then you'll close your eyes and whisper, “yes, but its all worthwhile”.
It's my parent's 30th anniversary and our Brian's christening on Saturday where in spite busy schedule preparing everything for the visitors, i still think of Jacob. I packed Beef Tapa and Pancit for him and even thinking of bringing him Salad for dessert. We didn't have a good conversation after hours of waiting for him then he finally said we're not meeting up because he's not in the mood and he wants to stay at home and watch Initial D. Then all of my insecurities and paranoia came out. I started thinking, just like what happened with Jeff, very similar indeed. He started confirming why he's sticking with me. He reminded me to stop counting the days and enjoy that we're together. I think his way of showing me that he likes me is seeing me everyday for dinner. Though i heard him said, "ano bang napapala ko pag pumupunta ko sayo? Kahit pagod ako nagpupunta pa din ako. Dapat maapreciate mo yun." I am not sure what that means but i just w...
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